i know there was a heck of a lot of complaining going on in the past few weeks - homesickness, frustration at the repetitive nights out, frustration with my 20-hour-a-week spanish course, annoyance with the aggressive boys, etc. etc. - but with the events of the past week, my outlook has finally completely changed.
after my trip to honduras, i am more confused than ever as to what i want to do with the rest of my life. pretty much since my junior year in high school, i have been convinced that international medicine is it. but with as little as three days in that village, everything has been flipped upside down.
being functional with spanish, i got to spend a lot of one on one time with the honduran doctors in the clinic. one thing one of the doctors said to me has stood out to me above all else. he told me that his favorite part of becoming a doctor is being able to interact with the patients, both rich and poor, to get to touch them and get to know them and help them in a really tangible manner. he said being a doctor is like being an artist, a scientist, and one other thing that's escaping me right now, all in one. essentially, his point was that everything he loved - from real human interaction to knowing he's making a tangible impact on humanity - was attainable through his practice.
i was both inspired by watching him and incredibly saddened. i think growing up in a developed country has left me feeling like death must be conquered at every turn. with the incredible technology and medical advances made every day, people are living longer and longer. i realized in honduras that this obsession with extending life is supremely unnatural. all these economic problems the states are facing can, in part, be directly attributed to the baby boomers who are increasingly relying on social security and medicare. it may sound barbaric but sometimes, it's just time to let go.
what we did in honduras was nothing more than a band-aid solution. through all my classes on global health/poverty, i was led to believe that big-name infectious diseases like TB and malaria are the most dire problems citizens of developing countries face. what I learned was that the three main things that affect people in the rural areas are things like dehydration that kills a lot of kids under five, malnutrition and parasites. in the cities, we find things that affect us in the States – things like depression and alcoholism.
with an incredible lack of public health education, the things that affect these people are things that doctors can't fix. ignoring the lack of access to any form of screening or testing which was the one of the biggest sources of my disillusionment as to how much of a difference a doctor can actually make in these impoverished areas, i was equally disillusioned by how little the people i interacted with knew about simple preventative care, about taking care of themselves and their families. less than a third of the people knew how to purify their water and those who did know didn't do it because they didn't really think it was that important. they failed to connect the lack of clean water with the parasites every single one of their children had. these parasites made the kids incredibly sick so they barely ever actually made it to school which embeds them even deeper into this sick cycle of poverty. without education, the kids are relegated to the same manual labor jobs as their parents and will very rarely amount to anything more. without productive citizens advancing the nation, these developing countries will never really develop and become competitive in an increasingly globalized market.
i was left to question, then, whether my talents would be better used as a doctor (because even with all the disillusionment, the satisfaction my doctors garnered as they helped their own people in this make-shift clinic was very, very real) or as some kind of policy-maker, perhaps, helping to set up infrastructure to target the needs of these villages. that, unfortunately, is a question i still have yet to answer and my time to decide is running out fairly quickly.
which brings me back to the purpose of this post. in the past week, i've interacted with an incredible amount of argentine citizens about their lives and the problems they see in their own country. additionally, i've finally started my integrated course at the university with other argentine students. the class is entitled human rights, gender and social work. it is very much like the critical gender studies classes i've taken at ucsd and i have to admit, it's wonderful to not have to learn new material but rather learn material i already know in spanish. this way, i'm not missing vital information but i'm learning the vocabulary and a specialized outlook from a latin american/argentine point of view. in the first class, i didn't participate but rather sat back and listened to the perspectives of both my classmates and the professor.
i've been feeling this way for quite a while but sitting in that class and just absorbing everything around me, i've started thinking that maybe i limited the options of what i can do with the rest of my life too early. one of the most influential role models in my life, my eldest cousin, told me repeatedly that if medicine is truly what i wanted to do, i would be immensely satisfied with my career choice as she is. but there was a huge possibility that i could find very many other paths that would lead me to the same amount of satisfaction.
after this class and these conversations with the locals, i'm really excited to truly start taking advantage of the opportunities available to me here. i've complained for much too long and the truth is that i'm here for the next five months so i might as well live it up to the best of my ability. i've been talking to the directors of my program a lot over the past week and they're going to put me into contact with a couple of ngo's in the city. i'm hoping to score an internship with one of them and start extending a lot more feelers into other career options. the goal is to finally commit to something by the time i come back home. i still have a ton to learn before i can do that, though, and i'm so excited to get started (:
Friday, August 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
you're a challenge. let's explore your talents.
it's been pretty much forever since i've last blogged which, really, is a good thing because it means that i've been too busy to sit at my computer for an extended period of time to write (:
before i forget - or before you get bored of this post and stop reading - i have to share the latest pick-up lines of the day.
1. very, very loud kissing sound that made me turn my head only because i didn't believe it was possible for a human to make that sound so loudly. and when he got my attention, all he had to say was "hola." haha. he clearly needs to work on his pick-up line skills.
2. "que bonita que sos, comiendo tu manzana."
translation: how beautiful you are, eating your apple.
yup. apparently something about the way i eat my apples is a turn-on. so as a warning, beware if you're around me while i munch on my granny smiths. i might very well just make you fall in love with me.
3. boys screaming the lyrics to american songs in your ear when you're at the club. it seems that they think knowing english words makes them a million times more awesome (which it kind of does because they have the cutest accent.. (: ) and when they find out you're american, they try even harder. it's pretty sweet haha.
last week was a blur of activity. on monday and tuesday, we had to do immigration stuff and i now officially have my temporary visa (: looks like i might actually be legally staying in this country until december. yay! i had my spanish final on thursday and thursday night, we took off for the weekend and headed to buenos aires.
the only word i can think of to describe buenos aires is phenomenal. i fell in love with everything about the city and it really made me think that perhaps i chose the wrong city to live in. we took a bus from córdoba that was supposed to take 10 hours and i was pretty much dreading it but it turned out to be a suuper comfy (you can see pictures of the entire trip, including the bus, here!) and i slept relatively well.
on friday, we went on a three hour city tour. buenos aires is huuge and there was so much to see on that first day. i'm not the biggest history buff but i truly enjoyed hearing about buenos aires' extensive history and the stories behind all the buildings. i took a LOT of pictures of the buildings because most of them have retained the original facade from colonial times.
we also went to la plaza de mayo and la casa rosada (the pink house). i think the one thing i consistently heard about argentina before coming here was the story of los desaparecidos (the disappeared). the history is moving and if you're truly interested, you should read about it from the source. for the purposes of giving you a short background, though, there was a coup after juan perón's presidency beginning in 1976. the dictatorship, as is common with most dictatorships, was terrified of any insurgency and began rounding up anyone who opposed the military. unfortunately, hundreds of people who were unaffiliated with the resistance movement were also kidnapped. of those captured, as many as 130 young girls were pregnant. they gave birth in prison and their children were either killed, abandoned or adopted by military families. most of their mothers were murdered. to this day, almost 35 years later, las abuelas de la plaza de mayo (grandmothers of the plaza de mayo) are still looking for their grandchildren. they don't necessarily want to bring them back into the folds of their family but rather believe that the children, adults now, have a right to know where they came from. remember that most of these kids were raised by military families, raised to believe that the dictatorship was just and right and their replacement by democratic government was a mistake. obviously, it would be incredibly difficult for these kids to intertwine themselves with families who were victimized by their adoptive parents. anyway, las abuelas are still very much active in la plaza de mayo and their pañuelos (handkerchiefs) are painted on the ground in the plaza.
la casa rosada is not where the president lives but is where she, and the executive offices, conduct their business. i didn't actually go inside but from what i heard, the guards were a lot more interested in flirting with the american girls than guarding the place. i wasn't that surprised..
on saturday, we went to eva perón's museum. that girl, besides being a wonderful human being, had a kiiiilller fashion sense. i wish i had been awake enough to take pictures of all her dresses to show you. we went to a little neighborhood called la boca (the mouth). la boca is said to have had some influence in the development of tango and every restaurant had live music and tango dancing. i definitely had myself some fun with the tango dancer (:
on saturday night, we went to a tango show which included dinner. oh my eff. the dinner was ridiculously good (as was the lunch buffet the day before. i definitely ate my weight in chocolate at the buffet... i have no idea where this sudden obsession with chocolate has come from considering how much i used to hate it..) and except for a piece of chicken that was hidden in my salad and i accidently bit into, it was both a wonderful meal and a wonderful show.
sunday, though, was hands down my FAVORITE day of the trip. we spent the entire morning at artisan's fairs and all the culture i've been looking for, all the people i've wanted to talk to on this trip, i found there. the first artist we stopped to talk to was originally from colombia but couldn't stand staying in one city for too long and so has been traveling up and down latin america for years. he lives off the money he makes from his jewelry and while we stopped to talk to him, he made my friend and i matching rings to remember each other by.
every street corner had live music and dancing and i can't really tell you how many times we stopped just to listen. i've been to a loot of live shows in the states but nothing really compares to the way these artists truly feel the music. as you watch them, it's as if you can tell that the music is coming from a place deep within their souls and it always affects me the same way. i don't think i have ever felt any better than i do when i watch live, unadulterated music that's not played for commercial or money-making purposes but truly comes from a place deep within. its infectious.
we talked to other artists, too, but only one more stood out to me.
he caught my attention because he was wearing a shirt with an om emblazoned across it. if you've read my previous posts, you know that i feel like a fish out of water here because i'm the only south asian i have ever seen in this country. to see a latin american man wearing an om shirt was definitely just as out of place. he was selling mandalas, which according to him, are like dream catchers but serve a greater purpose. instead of only focusing on dreams, mandalas are used to absorb bad energy and emit good energy. i bought one for myself made with green string, both because it's my favorite color and because green represents everything that has to do with mother earth. in essence, the mandala should help me stabilize myself and help me feel grounded, which at this point in my life, is certainly a necessity. i can also use all the good energy the universe has to give me as challenge after challenge arises during this incredible journey.
having bought my own mandala, i realized that i also wanted one made for someone who, i swear, shares my soul. i wanted hers personalized to fit her needs and i sat with him as he made her mandala. he was raised in the judeo-christian tradition and his mother was an aborigine and his father was from some south american country but i can't really remember which one. in any case, when he was a teenager, he stumbled upon eastern philosophy, the bhagvad gita (one of the hindu holy books) and, of course, the om. he said he was instantly drawn towards it and as he rebelled further and further from his christian upbringing, he started exploring the ancient magic of his mother's tribe. there, he learned how to make the mandalas. he said that whenever he feels stressed, he makes the mandalas because they not only serve other people when they buy them which in turns feeds him and gives him a place to sleep but also because he finds that it has a very healing effect on his soul. we thus started a conversation about souls and when i told him i think i have a very old soul, he said he thought the same thing the first time he looked into my eyes. in his estimation, i was a shaman in a past life which, according to what i want to do with the rest of my life, makes a heck of a lot of sense. i felt such a strong connection to him.
even if you don't believe in souls and are reading this and laughing at the load of bullshit, i'm sure its very easy to imagine how exciting it was to be able to have a very real, deep, philosophical conversation with an aborigine of latin america, who travels throughout the continent and has experienced so much. in the thirty minutes i sat with him, i feel like i got a very concrete understanding of his way of life and, quite honestly, to understand other people's cultures and ways of living is all i'm hoping to gain from this journey.
i left buenos aires feeling incredibly content. three days most definitely was not long enough to truly explore all the city has to offer & i absolutely cannot wait to go back.
before i forget - or before you get bored of this post and stop reading - i have to share the latest pick-up lines of the day.
1. very, very loud kissing sound that made me turn my head only because i didn't believe it was possible for a human to make that sound so loudly. and when he got my attention, all he had to say was "hola." haha. he clearly needs to work on his pick-up line skills.
2. "que bonita que sos, comiendo tu manzana."
translation: how beautiful you are, eating your apple.
yup. apparently something about the way i eat my apples is a turn-on. so as a warning, beware if you're around me while i munch on my granny smiths. i might very well just make you fall in love with me.
3. boys screaming the lyrics to american songs in your ear when you're at the club. it seems that they think knowing english words makes them a million times more awesome (which it kind of does because they have the cutest accent.. (: ) and when they find out you're american, they try even harder. it's pretty sweet haha.
last week was a blur of activity. on monday and tuesday, we had to do immigration stuff and i now officially have my temporary visa (: looks like i might actually be legally staying in this country until december. yay! i had my spanish final on thursday and thursday night, we took off for the weekend and headed to buenos aires.
the only word i can think of to describe buenos aires is phenomenal. i fell in love with everything about the city and it really made me think that perhaps i chose the wrong city to live in. we took a bus from córdoba that was supposed to take 10 hours and i was pretty much dreading it but it turned out to be a suuper comfy (you can see pictures of the entire trip, including the bus, here!) and i slept relatively well.
on friday, we went on a three hour city tour. buenos aires is huuge and there was so much to see on that first day. i'm not the biggest history buff but i truly enjoyed hearing about buenos aires' extensive history and the stories behind all the buildings. i took a LOT of pictures of the buildings because most of them have retained the original facade from colonial times.
we also went to la plaza de mayo and la casa rosada (the pink house). i think the one thing i consistently heard about argentina before coming here was the story of los desaparecidos (the disappeared). the history is moving and if you're truly interested, you should read about it from the source. for the purposes of giving you a short background, though, there was a coup after juan perón's presidency beginning in 1976. the dictatorship, as is common with most dictatorships, was terrified of any insurgency and began rounding up anyone who opposed the military. unfortunately, hundreds of people who were unaffiliated with the resistance movement were also kidnapped. of those captured, as many as 130 young girls were pregnant. they gave birth in prison and their children were either killed, abandoned or adopted by military families. most of their mothers were murdered. to this day, almost 35 years later, las abuelas de la plaza de mayo (grandmothers of the plaza de mayo) are still looking for their grandchildren. they don't necessarily want to bring them back into the folds of their family but rather believe that the children, adults now, have a right to know where they came from. remember that most of these kids were raised by military families, raised to believe that the dictatorship was just and right and their replacement by democratic government was a mistake. obviously, it would be incredibly difficult for these kids to intertwine themselves with families who were victimized by their adoptive parents. anyway, las abuelas are still very much active in la plaza de mayo and their pañuelos (handkerchiefs) are painted on the ground in the plaza.
la casa rosada is not where the president lives but is where she, and the executive offices, conduct their business. i didn't actually go inside but from what i heard, the guards were a lot more interested in flirting with the american girls than guarding the place. i wasn't that surprised..
on saturday, we went to eva perón's museum. that girl, besides being a wonderful human being, had a kiiiilller fashion sense. i wish i had been awake enough to take pictures of all her dresses to show you. we went to a little neighborhood called la boca (the mouth). la boca is said to have had some influence in the development of tango and every restaurant had live music and tango dancing. i definitely had myself some fun with the tango dancer (:
on saturday night, we went to a tango show which included dinner. oh my eff. the dinner was ridiculously good (as was the lunch buffet the day before. i definitely ate my weight in chocolate at the buffet... i have no idea where this sudden obsession with chocolate has come from considering how much i used to hate it..) and except for a piece of chicken that was hidden in my salad and i accidently bit into, it was both a wonderful meal and a wonderful show.
sunday, though, was hands down my FAVORITE day of the trip. we spent the entire morning at artisan's fairs and all the culture i've been looking for, all the people i've wanted to talk to on this trip, i found there. the first artist we stopped to talk to was originally from colombia but couldn't stand staying in one city for too long and so has been traveling up and down latin america for years. he lives off the money he makes from his jewelry and while we stopped to talk to him, he made my friend and i matching rings to remember each other by.
every street corner had live music and dancing and i can't really tell you how many times we stopped just to listen. i've been to a loot of live shows in the states but nothing really compares to the way these artists truly feel the music. as you watch them, it's as if you can tell that the music is coming from a place deep within their souls and it always affects me the same way. i don't think i have ever felt any better than i do when i watch live, unadulterated music that's not played for commercial or money-making purposes but truly comes from a place deep within. its infectious.
we talked to other artists, too, but only one more stood out to me.
he caught my attention because he was wearing a shirt with an om emblazoned across it. if you've read my previous posts, you know that i feel like a fish out of water here because i'm the only south asian i have ever seen in this country. to see a latin american man wearing an om shirt was definitely just as out of place. he was selling mandalas, which according to him, are like dream catchers but serve a greater purpose. instead of only focusing on dreams, mandalas are used to absorb bad energy and emit good energy. i bought one for myself made with green string, both because it's my favorite color and because green represents everything that has to do with mother earth. in essence, the mandala should help me stabilize myself and help me feel grounded, which at this point in my life, is certainly a necessity. i can also use all the good energy the universe has to give me as challenge after challenge arises during this incredible journey.
having bought my own mandala, i realized that i also wanted one made for someone who, i swear, shares my soul. i wanted hers personalized to fit her needs and i sat with him as he made her mandala. he was raised in the judeo-christian tradition and his mother was an aborigine and his father was from some south american country but i can't really remember which one. in any case, when he was a teenager, he stumbled upon eastern philosophy, the bhagvad gita (one of the hindu holy books) and, of course, the om. he said he was instantly drawn towards it and as he rebelled further and further from his christian upbringing, he started exploring the ancient magic of his mother's tribe. there, he learned how to make the mandalas. he said that whenever he feels stressed, he makes the mandalas because they not only serve other people when they buy them which in turns feeds him and gives him a place to sleep but also because he finds that it has a very healing effect on his soul. we thus started a conversation about souls and when i told him i think i have a very old soul, he said he thought the same thing the first time he looked into my eyes. in his estimation, i was a shaman in a past life which, according to what i want to do with the rest of my life, makes a heck of a lot of sense. i felt such a strong connection to him.
even if you don't believe in souls and are reading this and laughing at the load of bullshit, i'm sure its very easy to imagine how exciting it was to be able to have a very real, deep, philosophical conversation with an aborigine of latin america, who travels throughout the continent and has experienced so much. in the thirty minutes i sat with him, i feel like i got a very concrete understanding of his way of life and, quite honestly, to understand other people's cultures and ways of living is all i'm hoping to gain from this journey.
i left buenos aires feeling incredibly content. three days most definitely was not long enough to truly explore all the city has to offer & i absolutely cannot wait to go back.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
there's a class for this.
well, actually, i wish there was a class for this. my friend, nicole, and i have a long-standing joke about how incredibly awkward we are in this country.
tonight, we decided that we were tired of argentine food and thought we'd be all slick and try to make fried rice. well, we all remember what happened the last time we tried to be slick and take the bus... we were suuuper excited because we found soy sauce and garlic sauce in the super market. so we bought said spices and went to another super market to buy vegetables. we got to the check out and were told that we were supposed to weigh them. so we went back and weighed them and the little machine printed out a sticker we stuck on the bag and took back to check-out. the cashier looked at us, took the bag and went back to the vegetable section and got a second sticker with a barcode on it.
why in the world would the machine print out price tags if that's not the price tag we need to check out?! everything in argentina is more difficult... needless to say, the cashier looked at us like we were totally incompetent. and to top it off, as we tried to leave the store, we couldn't quite figure out how to work the door because most are a simple push/pull system but this one had a sneaky, sneaky doorknob. i'm sure they were all laughing hysterically as we walked out of the store. neverr going back there again ):
and so we get back to the house and try to cook the fried rice. it smells delicious and we're all excited but of course, the ingredients are far from the same ones we have at home so it was all funky tasting. and the family we fed with our creation now thinks that that's what chinese fried rice tastes like... oops. haha we certainly did not give them the best impression.
oh, argentina. its been almost a month - when are we everrr going to get it right? at least these experiences make for funny stories (: and if anything, are teaching me to laugh at myself like neverr before.
tonight, we decided that we were tired of argentine food and thought we'd be all slick and try to make fried rice. well, we all remember what happened the last time we tried to be slick and take the bus... we were suuuper excited because we found soy sauce and garlic sauce in the super market. so we bought said spices and went to another super market to buy vegetables. we got to the check out and were told that we were supposed to weigh them. so we went back and weighed them and the little machine printed out a sticker we stuck on the bag and took back to check-out. the cashier looked at us, took the bag and went back to the vegetable section and got a second sticker with a barcode on it.
why in the world would the machine print out price tags if that's not the price tag we need to check out?! everything in argentina is more difficult... needless to say, the cashier looked at us like we were totally incompetent. and to top it off, as we tried to leave the store, we couldn't quite figure out how to work the door because most are a simple push/pull system but this one had a sneaky, sneaky doorknob. i'm sure they were all laughing hysterically as we walked out of the store. neverr going back there again ):
and so we get back to the house and try to cook the fried rice. it smells delicious and we're all excited but of course, the ingredients are far from the same ones we have at home so it was all funky tasting. and the family we fed with our creation now thinks that that's what chinese fried rice tastes like... oops. haha we certainly did not give them the best impression.
oh, argentina. its been almost a month - when are we everrr going to get it right? at least these experiences make for funny stories (: and if anything, are teaching me to laugh at myself like neverr before.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
i know we're gonna leave this town. get new passports and get out now.
nostalgia.
tonight, two of my friends and i baked chocolate chip cookies. while the desserts here are to die for, sometimes you just need a piece of good ol` american food.
i was reminded so intensely of the last time i baked chocolate chip cookies - my last night in sd. it was, by far, one of the best nights i have had in the two years at that school. i spent the night with some of my favorite people in the world - my sisters, my boy, a few of my best friends - and leaving the next day was one of the hardest things i have ever had to do. i saw some of them again over the next three weeks before i left the country but i knew that night that everything was about to change.
i don't mean to sound dramatic but i'm being completely honest when i say that i knew things will, in fact, be dramatically different when i come back to sd in january. this coming thursday marks a month in argentina and in retrospect, it is so hard to believe i've already been here for so long. i've been having all these wonderful experiences, learning to be independent, to fend for myself, realizing that i'm capable of a lot more than i ever thought.
i'm seeing myself in a new light - the past two quarters at sd have been the hardest for me because aside from personal turmoil, i've been questioning what i want to do with my life, whether i want to go to med school right after graduation, whether i still even want to go to med school at all or whether my talents and abilities would be better used in another field like global health policy instead of active practice of medicine. i don't know that those are questions i'll find answers to here but the lethargy that plagued me the last two quarters is now virtually non-existent. finally, i'm just as determined as i've always been, determined to succeed, to learn, to make the most of my experience here.
in the same vein that i'm learning all these things about myself and growing as a person, though, i know everyone back home will be growing and changing over the next five months and i'll be too far away to notice the changes. it's not that i expect to be replaced because in the grand scheme of things, five months truly is not that long but to not grow together means to grow apart. that much, i know from experience. i feel like by the time i come back, some things will have changed drastically and i won't know how to fit myself back into a puzzle i've always naturally been a part of. the very idea terrifies me.
i also don't want it to sound like i regret the decision to come. i am so thankful to have this experience and it's something i would do a million times over should i be given the chance for do-overs. still, it's incredibly difficult to be so far away, so far removed, from everyone i love. daily or weekly conversations keep me informed of things going on at home but it's hard to be here when i know my loves are experiencing difficulties and are hurting and i can't offer any more comfort than mere words; its hard to hear of my friends getting together or seeing pictures of them and to not be with them myself; in some cases, it's even harder to talk super often than to not talk at all because it makes the desire to be close to that person so much stronger, makes how much i miss them that much worse.
i'm glad i'm here and i know the homesickness will pass. for now, though, i wish i could click my heels and come home.
tonight, two of my friends and i baked chocolate chip cookies. while the desserts here are to die for, sometimes you just need a piece of good ol` american food.
i was reminded so intensely of the last time i baked chocolate chip cookies - my last night in sd. it was, by far, one of the best nights i have had in the two years at that school. i spent the night with some of my favorite people in the world - my sisters, my boy, a few of my best friends - and leaving the next day was one of the hardest things i have ever had to do. i saw some of them again over the next three weeks before i left the country but i knew that night that everything was about to change.
i don't mean to sound dramatic but i'm being completely honest when i say that i knew things will, in fact, be dramatically different when i come back to sd in january. this coming thursday marks a month in argentina and in retrospect, it is so hard to believe i've already been here for so long. i've been having all these wonderful experiences, learning to be independent, to fend for myself, realizing that i'm capable of a lot more than i ever thought.
i'm seeing myself in a new light - the past two quarters at sd have been the hardest for me because aside from personal turmoil, i've been questioning what i want to do with my life, whether i want to go to med school right after graduation, whether i still even want to go to med school at all or whether my talents and abilities would be better used in another field like global health policy instead of active practice of medicine. i don't know that those are questions i'll find answers to here but the lethargy that plagued me the last two quarters is now virtually non-existent. finally, i'm just as determined as i've always been, determined to succeed, to learn, to make the most of my experience here.
in the same vein that i'm learning all these things about myself and growing as a person, though, i know everyone back home will be growing and changing over the next five months and i'll be too far away to notice the changes. it's not that i expect to be replaced because in the grand scheme of things, five months truly is not that long but to not grow together means to grow apart. that much, i know from experience. i feel like by the time i come back, some things will have changed drastically and i won't know how to fit myself back into a puzzle i've always naturally been a part of. the very idea terrifies me.
i also don't want it to sound like i regret the decision to come. i am so thankful to have this experience and it's something i would do a million times over should i be given the chance for do-overs. still, it's incredibly difficult to be so far away, so far removed, from everyone i love. daily or weekly conversations keep me informed of things going on at home but it's hard to be here when i know my loves are experiencing difficulties and are hurting and i can't offer any more comfort than mere words; its hard to hear of my friends getting together or seeing pictures of them and to not be with them myself; in some cases, it's even harder to talk super often than to not talk at all because it makes the desire to be close to that person so much stronger, makes how much i miss them that much worse.
i'm glad i'm here and i know the homesickness will pass. for now, though, i wish i could click my heels and come home.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
all reason aside, i just can't deny.
i have come up with the idea to do pick-up line of the day - i think it'll soon become the most entertaining part of this blog. (and no, i swear i'm not being conceited. i'm sure even boys who look like girls from behind get hit on.)
pick-up line of the day:
"hola bon a bon - ven aca!"
literal translation: "hey [insert chocolate brand here] - come here!"
real translation: "heyyy sweet thangg - lemme holla atchuuu!"
new traffic law of the day: stop signs are mere suggestions and in many cases, don't even warrant slowing down.
frustration of the day: (but really, frustration of the past three weeks and next five months) - argentina may have the shittiest currency system in the world. seriously. the ATMs only shoot out hundreds but NO STORE (and no, not an exaggeration) has change. in fact, when i went to the panaderia this afternoon, the cashier, after forcing me to dig around in my bag for enough change to pay for my factura instead of just letting me pay with a $5 and get change back, decided to just not give me change at all. solid. and then i really wanted ice cream but alas, no one had change. i had to sweet talk one of the cashiers to root around for change. sometimes, it's wonderful to be a girl (:
thing you should know about argentina of the day: there are no one-stop, buy all you need stores like target here (though there is one walmart somewhere in this city...). instead, you have the panaderia (sweet shop), ferreteria (power tools, screw drivers, paint shop thing), carniceria (meat shop), verderia (vegetable shop), fruteria (fruit shop), etc. etc. quaint but also extremely time-consuming. sometimes, it's very easy to miss the comforts of america...
oh oh, also, milkshake by kelis was definitely playing on the sound system at the panaderia today. kind of really surprised it made it all the way out here...
pick-up line of the day:
"hola bon a bon - ven aca!"
literal translation: "hey [insert chocolate brand here] - come here!"
real translation: "heyyy sweet thangg - lemme holla atchuuu!"
new traffic law of the day: stop signs are mere suggestions and in many cases, don't even warrant slowing down.
frustration of the day: (but really, frustration of the past three weeks and next five months) - argentina may have the shittiest currency system in the world. seriously. the ATMs only shoot out hundreds but NO STORE (and no, not an exaggeration) has change. in fact, when i went to the panaderia this afternoon, the cashier, after forcing me to dig around in my bag for enough change to pay for my factura instead of just letting me pay with a $5 and get change back, decided to just not give me change at all. solid. and then i really wanted ice cream but alas, no one had change. i had to sweet talk one of the cashiers to root around for change. sometimes, it's wonderful to be a girl (:
thing you should know about argentina of the day: there are no one-stop, buy all you need stores like target here (though there is one walmart somewhere in this city...). instead, you have the panaderia (sweet shop), ferreteria (power tools, screw drivers, paint shop thing), carniceria (meat shop), verderia (vegetable shop), fruteria (fruit shop), etc. etc. quaint but also extremely time-consuming. sometimes, it's very easy to miss the comforts of america...
oh oh, also, milkshake by kelis was definitely playing on the sound system at the panaderia today. kind of really surprised it made it all the way out here...
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
did i not tell you that i'm not like that?
ten points if you can place the song lyrics. without googling it.
tomorrow marks the day that i have been in this country for three weeks. as such, my lovely friend, nicole, and i have come up with a list of survival tips should you ever choose to come visit argentina (which i highly recommend you do...)
tips to survive argentina -
rule 1. if you are trying to cross the street, do not ever try to cross when the light turns yellow. in the states, cars will continue to speed through. in argentina, when drivers notice the perpendicular light turning yellow, they go. if you try walking, you will probably get hit.
rule 2. carry change - no one ever likes giving you change and taxi drivers especially get frustrated if you don't have small bills. some of the very sly ones will take the $100 or $50 (pesos) you pay with, swap it super sneakily with a counterfeit bill and tell you that you've paid them with fake money. then they proceed to show you how to tell if the bill is fake to prove to you that your bill is fake. then you are forced to pay them with a new bill and they make about a $100 off you foreigner.
rule 3. bring hot sauce with you.
rule 4. girls can get into boliches for free if you say you're from the states and you don't speak very much spanish (;
tips to survive boys in argentina -
rule 1. no eye contact. ever.
rule 2. do not, under any circumstances, look up when you hear honks, whistles, cat calls. do not look up even if they tell you that you're 'la reina de mi corazón" (the queen of my heart) or if, in english, they ask you to marry them. (yes, this has, in fact, happened to me).
rule 3. in bars or boliches (dance clubs) or after sundown, always travel in groups. (this is probably also a survival tip...)
rule 4. when in a boliche, keep your hands fisted at all times. better yet, pretend you don't have any hands and hide them. less chances of a boy trying to grab your hand to 'dance' with you.
rule 5. make your favorite refrain 'no, gracias"
experiences.
1. there is quite literally a panederia (sweet shop/bakery) every two or three stores. it's really hard to resist the delicious facturas (which are kind of like croissants except sweet) when they're stare at you out of the majority of the store windows that you pass and only cost about .50 cents a piece.
2. a few friends and i went to this group called 'english and mate.' mate is the tea that they drink here and everyone kind of sits around in the evening and drinks mate in the park or on porches so someone came up with the idea of getting a group together to speak english and drink mate. afterwards, we have cervezas y español. all of these people who are trying to learn english show up every week and it's composed of the most diverse people i have seen in this city yet. i met so many wonderful people - people from the states who are just backpacking through argentina, an englishman who worked here for a year for an ngo, argentines who took some english in elementary school but want to learn to speak it functionally, study abroad students from france, someone from berkeley who fell in love with the city and decided to move here permanently. it was pretty much precisely the kind of cultural experience i have been looking for this entire time.
3. yesterday in class, we spent the morning class (2.5 hours) discussing the economies of france, argentina and the united states. approximately half of my class are french exchange students and two of them in particular and i have such a deep seated interest in each other's cultures and socioeconomic/political spheres. it was probably the most stimulating and culturally rich conversation i've had since i've been here. and it was all in spanish!
4. today, we met our "speaking partners" - argentine students at the university who are interested in learning english. essentially, each date, we choose a language to speak so both of us get practice and grammatical corrections for our respective languages that we're trying to learn. my speaking parter is such a sweetheart and she is so interested in language and culture - she, of course, speaks spanish but also reads/writes/understands english and japanese but is a little shy to speak those languages. i'll break her in yet (:
- also, fact that i found out yesterday - it is legal to drive in argentina after drinking up to a blood alcohol level of 0.3% ... my road crossing rules are therefore even more important to follow!
*visit the facebook to see pictures of what i see on my daily walk to school!
tomorrow marks the day that i have been in this country for three weeks. as such, my lovely friend, nicole, and i have come up with a list of survival tips should you ever choose to come visit argentina (which i highly recommend you do...)
tips to survive argentina -
rule 1. if you are trying to cross the street, do not ever try to cross when the light turns yellow. in the states, cars will continue to speed through. in argentina, when drivers notice the perpendicular light turning yellow, they go. if you try walking, you will probably get hit.
rule 2. carry change - no one ever likes giving you change and taxi drivers especially get frustrated if you don't have small bills. some of the very sly ones will take the $100 or $50 (pesos) you pay with, swap it super sneakily with a counterfeit bill and tell you that you've paid them with fake money. then they proceed to show you how to tell if the bill is fake to prove to you that your bill is fake. then you are forced to pay them with a new bill and they make about a $100 off you foreigner.
rule 3. bring hot sauce with you.
rule 4. girls can get into boliches for free if you say you're from the states and you don't speak very much spanish (;
tips to survive boys in argentina -
rule 1. no eye contact. ever.
rule 2. do not, under any circumstances, look up when you hear honks, whistles, cat calls. do not look up even if they tell you that you're 'la reina de mi corazón" (the queen of my heart) or if, in english, they ask you to marry them. (yes, this has, in fact, happened to me).
rule 3. in bars or boliches (dance clubs) or after sundown, always travel in groups. (this is probably also a survival tip...)
rule 4. when in a boliche, keep your hands fisted at all times. better yet, pretend you don't have any hands and hide them. less chances of a boy trying to grab your hand to 'dance' with you.
rule 5. make your favorite refrain 'no, gracias"
experiences.
1. there is quite literally a panederia (sweet shop/bakery) every two or three stores. it's really hard to resist the delicious facturas (which are kind of like croissants except sweet) when they're stare at you out of the majority of the store windows that you pass and only cost about .50 cents a piece.
2. a few friends and i went to this group called 'english and mate.' mate is the tea that they drink here and everyone kind of sits around in the evening and drinks mate in the park or on porches so someone came up with the idea of getting a group together to speak english and drink mate. afterwards, we have cervezas y español. all of these people who are trying to learn english show up every week and it's composed of the most diverse people i have seen in this city yet. i met so many wonderful people - people from the states who are just backpacking through argentina, an englishman who worked here for a year for an ngo, argentines who took some english in elementary school but want to learn to speak it functionally, study abroad students from france, someone from berkeley who fell in love with the city and decided to move here permanently. it was pretty much precisely the kind of cultural experience i have been looking for this entire time.
3. yesterday in class, we spent the morning class (2.5 hours) discussing the economies of france, argentina and the united states. approximately half of my class are french exchange students and two of them in particular and i have such a deep seated interest in each other's cultures and socioeconomic/political spheres. it was probably the most stimulating and culturally rich conversation i've had since i've been here. and it was all in spanish!
4. today, we met our "speaking partners" - argentine students at the university who are interested in learning english. essentially, each date, we choose a language to speak so both of us get practice and grammatical corrections for our respective languages that we're trying to learn. my speaking parter is such a sweetheart and she is so interested in language and culture - she, of course, speaks spanish but also reads/writes/understands english and japanese but is a little shy to speak those languages. i'll break her in yet (:
- also, fact that i found out yesterday - it is legal to drive in argentina after drinking up to a blood alcohol level of 0.3% ... my road crossing rules are therefore even more important to follow!
*visit the facebook to see pictures of what i see on my daily walk to school!
Sunday, July 24, 2011
seasons change.
*disclaimer: all dialogue actually occurred in spanish but has been translated for blogging purposes.
i don't even know where to begin. i've been here for two weeks and have been putting off the creation of this blog solely because i have no idea how to put into words what i've been experiencing over the last 16 or so days. for the first time maybe ever, words fail me.
for starters, let's say that this country is very different from anything i could have expected or foreseen.
poverty and the economy.
the country ranks somewhere between 21 and 23 in terms of national GDP and 46 in terms of human development. the dollar, additionally, is worth 4 pesos. numbers, however, never quite prepare you for real life experiences. i, of course, expected some measure of poverty but had very little idea how it would manifest itself.
as in any developing country, the dilapidated houses and pot-hole filled roads are a staple. what the numbers didn't tell, however, was that the poverty far from defines the nation or its people. from the minute i stepped off the plane, i was greeted with warm hearts and open arms. i'm actually surprised at myself for expecting any different. my experiences in other poverty-stricken nations - namely Honduras and India - have very much been identical to my time and interactions with argentines.
still, i have been struggling for quite some time to garner some kind of understanding of how the economic system works here. universidad nacional de córdoba, where i am studying, is free not only for all argentines but also for citizens from all of the neighboring countries. there are approximately 110,000 students enrolled in the university. in a time where my tuition at a public school in the states is continually increasing (32% increase in the last quarter alone), i simply cannot fathom how a country which a much lower GDP can afford to educate so many students free.
when i went to get my student visa, i talked to the immigration official for almost thirty minutes about this very topic. in his estimation, the ridiculous visa fees and reciprocity fee to exit the country, coupled with a thriving tourism sector and considerable taxes (though very similar to tax rates in the states), allows the state to funnel a lot of revenue to social services - namely education and health care.
as a student of the university, i am also granted an extensive insurance plan. for 10 pesos, or $2.50, i can have a doctor perform a house call. prescriptions are 60% covered and the insurance extends to psychiatric care as well. this plan, of course, is also available to all the students enrolled in the university.
the math doesn't add up for me, though, and when the actual semester starts, i'll be taking a class called "the social and economic issues of latin america," where i think i'll be able to attain an actual understanding of the economic system here (which is replicated in much of latin america).
to read about argentina's sick cycle of economic downfalls, read here.
politics.
the country is in the midst of presidential primary campaigns which i believe are held in october. i also think i will be here for the election of the next president. moreover, the province of córdoba is also holding gubernatorial elections. needless to say, i've come in a very politically charged time and it is very reminiscent of the 2008 elections where i was extremely interested in the political proceedings but could not participate because i wasn't of age. i'm very excited to follow the campaigns here.
from the ginormous billboards and ads plastered all over the city, it seems as the socialist party is the most well known (or maybe just the best organized so they have their name out more often). raised in american society where i was taught to inherently be wary of socialism, i'm beginning to think that with free education and such an extensive health care system, there might be something to this socialism. additionally, i saw one of their ads supporting a woman's right to choose in terms of getting abortion legalized here and so, of course, my allegiance has begun to swing towards the socialist left here.
weather.
the other most striking thing as i got off the plane? the fact that it was 32 degrees outside. thirty. two. degrees. i realize now that i am very much a socal girl through and through. i don't know that i've ever felt 32 degrees in my entire life - i mean, i've only ever seen snow once. to leave LAX at 94 degrees and walk into the middle of winter here was, to say the least, a shock. i haven't transitioned to the cold weather very well and keep the mini heater in my room lit almost always. it is, however, a live flame and i definitely lit my hair on fire this afternoon when i bent down to light it ): kind of surprised it took me over two weeks to hurt myself with it..
the cold front last through august and spring should begin sometime in september. i'm kind of excited to see the change of actual seasons for once (:
classes.
i've been taking an intensive spanish language class for the last two weeks and it will last for two more. by intensive language, they mean intensive. the class lasts for five hours a day, four days a week. there are weekly tests and homework assignments every night. i grumble about the work load but there is no denying that my spanish is improving dramatically. i think it's a very steep learning curve for the first four weeks and will probably plateau out by the time actual classes start.
i'm taking the CELU (or spanish as a second language proficiency) exam this coming thursday and if i pass with an intermediate or advanced score, i'll be certified as a fluent spanish speaker (: wish me luck!
the university is in the middle of their winter break at the moment so the campus is pretty much deserted. i can't wait to see what it's like when all 110,000 students are back on campus for the start of the semester.
i will be taking four classes at the international center, taught by UNC professors but geared towards international students for whom spanish is a second or third language. depending on my CELU score, i might be able to enroll in one class at the university where i will be integrated with argentine students. because those classes have no wiggle rooms for international students, most people end up dropping that class because its simply too difficult. i have my fingers crossed for myself..
social life.
as many of you know, i was terrified of making new friends here. i came without knowing a single person and as per my mom's brilliant suggestion, i talked to a few people from the program over facebook before i came but that it did little more than break the ice. there are quite a number of students who knew each other before they came to argentina as their colleges had contracts with the program. i, however, found this program on my own since the UC system doesn't really have any direct exchange programs with latin american countries.
as everyone was telling me before i left though, i made friends really easily and we've been sharing many first experiences together. we are definitely that group of foreigners who stand out in the crowd. i am quite literally the only indian in this entire city and regardless of where i go or who i am with, i draw stares because i look nothing like anyone else here. a lot of my friends blend in really easily here because argentines are so diverse looking. drawing upon a lot of european influence plus some indigenous/interracial marriages with citizens of neighboring countries, the skin color rangers from tan to extremely fair skinned. you'll find hair colors of all types here and the eyes. oh. my. lord. their eyes are freaking gorgeous. i don't think i've ever seen so many brightly colored eyes in one place ever. they kind of just make me melt (:
but as you can probably tell, an extremely tan girl with very distinct almond-shaped eyes and nose and dark hair stands out in the crowd. i don't necessarily mind the curiosity - it just has made me extremely self-conscious of my heritage. most people i talk to who ask about my origins are very sweet though and have nothing but compliments to hand out. i'll take it (:
the nightlife is poppin` in this place. the constant refrain amongst my friends and i is that we haven't figured out how argentines stay alive because they don't sleep and they don't eat. bars and clubs don't open until 1 or 2 am whereas last call in the states is 2 am. so everyone goes out at 1 and no one gets home before 5 or 6 am and during the school year, almost everyone has classes in the morning. still, you'll find people out at all hours on any given day. and as for the food, lunch is usually around nooon and they don't eat dinner until 10 pm. i'm used to fairly late dinners but with 10 hours in between meals, snacking is abundant. you'll very rarely find argentines who snack more than a late afternoon tea, though, so we still haven't quite figured out how argentines survive. us estadounidenses are struggling for sure.
the clubs are pretty fun. i've never been to one in the states so i don't have much to compare it to but i have to admit, the drunk boys get old very quickly. i'm hoping once we're more settled here, we'll either figure out a way to carry ourselves better in the clubs or we'll find something else to do rather than go dancing every weekend.
notable experiences.
1. what is the one thing argentina is known for? SOCCER. and by some freak stroke of amazing luck, copa américa was held here in córdoba! we went to the brazil v. ecuador game. my bets were on brazil and sure enough, they scored the first goal and i got all excited. the section over was a solid wall of green and yellow and they went wild but no one near where i was sitting was cheering. when ecuador scored the next goal, my section erupted and i realized one goal too late that i was sitting in the wrong section. my allegiance switched over pretty quickly haha. but in my heart, i was still rooting for brazil and of course, they won (:
2. the bus. córdoba has a pretty extensive public transit system but as is common in most developing countries, it runs on an internal clock unbeknownst to the general public. there's no timetable on which the bus runs. and really, it only stops when it feels like it. we tried to use the bus to get to the game but two of the buses we needed to take went right past the bus stop and even though the drivers saw us flagging them down, chose not to stop. we finally managed to get one to stop and made it to the game in time though (:
and so, after a semi-successful first bus experience, i thought i'd be sly and take the bus home from school once. i live thirty-ish minutes away from the university on foot and i was exhausted after getting little sleep the night before so i wanted to take the bus. i got on the right bus and we traveled down streets that i recognized. we're moving west towards my house but i know we're about 10 blocks north so i figured the bus had to turn left at some point to swing closer to my house. in córdoba, however, the street names change every 20 or 30 blocks and so i didn't actually have any idea where we were because i didn't recognize any of the street names. we finally turn on the street i live on but i had no idea how far we were from the house so i didn't get off. i figured that much like home, the bus would have to loop around at some point and then i would get off. well, we just kept getting further and further away from the center and town and all too quickly, it was too late for me to get off the bus and attempt to walk home. we were in a residential area and so it wasn't even like i could get off the bus and hail a taxi to get home. besides, a taxi from that point would have been pretty expensive. i started tracking our path on the map of the city i had so i could figure out where to get off and find my way home. an hour later, we were no longer on the map and i was the only passenger left on the bus. i finally sucked up my pride when the bus driver beckoned me over and i told him i was lost. he asked where i needed to go and i said downtown and he goes, you do realize we passed the center about an hour ago. oh yes. i knew very well how far i was from home. he took pity on my poor soul and after showing me where i should have gotten off, he went off his route and pulled up right next to my house and dropped me off. i told you - warm hearts and open arms (:
3. food. my family is wonderful at making sure there are solid vegetarian meals available. i eat a lot of pizza, pasta, tartas (which are kind of like casseroles mixed with a pizza), and potato and egg pancakes. after two weeks of zero spice, though, a friend and i were seriously craving mexican food. we walked about ten blocks to a place i had found online only to find out it no longer exists. so we walk back the way and pop into an italian restaurant but they serve no vegetarian food. so we ended up at a place called jonny b. good's which is supposed to be an american restaurant. let's just say that the concept of american food (or really purely ethnic food...) doesn't exist here and we paid a whole lot of money for a whole lot of nothing. we're learning the hard way, i guess.
i really am having SUCH a wonderful time, though. it's hard to imagine that i'm going to be here for another five months. time is passing by so slowly which is giving the homesickness a lot of time to settle in. i miss people from home almost to an excruciating degree but my novel experiences and time with friends here are an inexpressible comfort. i think once we figure out how to meld our own cultural identities with the reality of fully immersing ourselves in another culture, i'll feel a lot more comfortable. until then, suffice it to say that everything is much more difficult in argentina, in spanish, and extremely entertaining, awkward moments rule our lives.
*for pictures that accompany many of my experiences, click on the link on the right! and send me mail!!
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